Tantra

is amazing.

Try it sometime.

I love The Perks of a Wallflower.

It's amazing.

I'm trying out new ideas.

I'll post later.

Two Cigarette Train

There's a beetle crawling towards me as I type. Kinda freaked out, not gonna lie.

It's really hot outside.

Like, Texas hot. Texas-in-summer hot. Front-door-open, Texas-in-summer hot.

The fish are kissing, and the cat is climbing the screen door. He's almost able to open it, now. He knows to push the button, but he isn't strong enough to fully depress it. He thinks I'm gonna let him in. What am I? A pushover? Hardly. I'll let him in anyway. . . in a few hours. Or minutes. Not days, that's mean. Not seconds, that's kind.

Luckily, I don't work on Father's Day. I'm fairly certain my fam wouldn't be too happy 'bout that.

I'm just waiting for the CWS. Can't wait.

(Did I succeed?)

To Meet A New Friend

First, let me say that I've never really met anyone under awkward circumstances... (by this I mean to exclude meeting someone who is working the street with me) However, last night, the opportunity arose. It was actually quite exciting. Meeting the friend of a friend for the first time while the friend of the friend is in jail... not the best first impression, perhaps. Good thing it was almost my curfew or that first meeting would have been, uh, rough. It's also a good thing that I usually don't remember meeting people for the first time.

Wait.

Yeah.

I don't remember meeting Michael. Or Janelle. Or Ashley. Or Marcos. Or Sam. Or Torrey. I don't remember meeting anyone at Rice, although I do remember the first time I saw Robert and Brian in person. I think the only reason I can "remember" meeting Brittany is because I didn't remember, like, sophomore year and she "refreshed" my memory (You know, of course, we met freshman year. And me "remembering" is the word 'Big Bird').

Anyway.

That was an interesting night.

Goodnight.

Smile!

That was a younger me. Don't I look the same? ;)

Oh geez.

Can Anybody Find Me...

Someone worth knowing.
Somebody to love.
Someone I don't have to lie to.
Someone who knows me.
Somebody I'm comfortable with.
Same color, different hue.
?

This was under my "I'd Like To Meet" section in MySpace. Mmm. It's still true. I mean. I wasn't trying to pull a Queen and ask to find someone to marry. Believe me, I find enough people by myself. Allow me to explain each line:

1. "Someone worth knowing." I am beginning to believe that it is difficult to find people who are timeless (read: people who are worth an eternity or more). Friendship is an investment in time... And sometimes it seems that the currency has become severely inflated. Think about all of the networking sites available via the Internet. MySpace, Facebook, Blogger, LiveJournal, Xanga, blah blah blah... For any that I've ever involved myself in, I've received numerous random friend requests. People I've never meet and people I barely know feel completely comfortable adding me as one of their friends. I'm sorry, but I have to feel really good about a possible relationship before allowing interaction. I am kinda, um, anal about who is accepted into my counsel of friends. A greater majority have proved themselves through various tests. No, I don't mean that I actually planned how each of my friends would be tested. Well, for some, I did, kinda. Sometimes I get kinda paranoid. (If you really do know me, you know that's true.) Anyway, back to the point, random people does not equal people who interest me or who will prove to be worth the time of day.
2. "Somebody to love." Pretty easy. Can't be friends if you don't feel something positive. Because I believe friendship is an investment in time and because time is precious, friendship is precious. So, the limited number of friends allowed from rule number one coupled with the value of friendship determined by this rule means that when I consider someone to be a friend, I love them. Sincerely and without restriction. (I complain sometimes. Duh, I'm only human.)
3. "Someone I don't have to lie to." Aha. Now we get somewhere good. Raise your hand if you are a liar. (Pick me! Pick me!) Okay. I have this need to lie to people. Sometimes I do it because I can. Sometimes it just kinda flows out, unexpectedly. I've come to the realization, however, that when I am who I am when I talk to you, I'm less of a nontruth speaker and more of a truth giver. I even exaggerate less. Isn't that fun?
4. "Someone who knows me." I don't really know how weird or difficult it is to get to know me. I've either known myself for so long, I can't remember meeting myself or I don't know the first thing about myself and it's like I'll never know who I am. What a dichotomy. Anyway, my lying can be difficult, I know. But I have to know that someone knows me... I've even thought of five different categories people can be thrown into: People I Don't Know, People I Know, People I Talk To, LifeMates, and Family. Of the five, I would say that the last two know me (mostly), and the middle one might get to know me. Whatev.
5. "Somebody I'm comfortable with." Duh.
6. "Same color, different hue." Oh man. I don't even know how to begin to explain this one... I guess if you looked to my LifeMates, you might see that they are generally the same person, just each was mixed a little differently. Same dish, different chefs? Each has his or her own special flavor, unique taste that just makes me happy. (Not that I've tasted them. All of them, I mean.) Same tune, different tempo? Exactly the same on the page, but each is obviously not the same as the next. Same book, different language? Each is to be understood in their own language (read: Michaelisms, Flute language), but it's not like I haven't already seen it somewhere else ("Learn a new language, get a new soul" stuff). Even then... some of my friends are more green than blue, more blue than purple.... Some are more spicy than sweet, more sweet than savory... More andante than moderate, more moderate than lively... Closer to English than French, closer to French than Japanese... But I match my LifeMates well. We've chosen each other well, I suppose. :)

Now that I've successfully written my first longish post, I can go to sleep.

YAY!

Life On The Other Side

I'm leaving MySpace. For good. Forever and always. There's almost nothing important on MySpace. Just a bunch of crappy pages filled with junk that almost doesn't matter, junk that's virtually useless (no pun intended?). I'll move whatever I feel is necessary to this blog. Maybe I'll make it so that I actually know who in the world reads my blog. Only slightly creepy to know that more than 100 people go to my MySpace blog in a day. Heavy on the slightly. I've done creepier... I think. Probably. Most likely.

Okay. So.

I'm in love with "Everything" by Michael Bublé:




(sigh) I think that he's kinda aMAZing. And I think I would love to marry him.
I guess he's my Vocal Jazz Lover. My everything. :)

Peace.